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| Material Data Sheet | ||
| Woman - A Chemical Analysis | ||
| Element | Woman | |
| Symbol | WO | |
| Discoverer | Adam | |
| Atomic Mass | Accepted as 118, but known to vary from 100 to 460lbs | |
| Occurence | Copious quantities in all urban ares | |
| Physical Properties | ||
| 1 Surface covered with a film of paint | ||
| 2 Boils at nothing and freezes without reason | ||
| 3 Melts if given special treatment | ||
| 4 Bitter if incorrectly used | ||
| 5 Found in various states ranging from virgin to common ore | ||
| 6 Yields to pressure when applied correctly | ||
| Chemical Properties | ||
| 1 Has great affinity for Gold, Silver, Platinum and precious stones | ||
| 2 Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances | ||
| 3 May explode spontaneously if left alone with a male | ||
| 4 Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol | ||
| 5 Most powerful money reducing agent | ||
| Common Uses | ||
| 1 Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars | ||
| 2 Can be a great aid to relaxation | ||
| Tests | ||
| 1 Pure specimen turns a rosy pink when discovered in a natural state | ||
| 2 Turns green when placed beside a better specimen | ||
| Hazards | ||
| 1 Highly dangerous except in experienced hands | ||
| 2 Illegal to possess more than one | ||
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